The foundation and blusher was fine, but the eye makeup felt like a hassle to apply and was the part that made me look really weird! I was actually glad to get it off and back to my bare face! The second was at physio last week. When I came out of the hospital, I bumped into an old school friend. Normally I'd be recoiling at the thought of someone I know, seeing me without makeup, hair a mess etc but I just smiled, said "Hello" and didn't let it trouble me. I didn't start panicking about how she must think I look ill/like crap, I just let it go. That's HUGE for me. In the past, I've felt really embarrassed that other people are seeing me look so bad, which is a ridiculous pressure for someone that's been so ill, to still try and look perfectly made up at all times. In a way I think it's good that it's pushed me over the years to attempt all these things (getting dressed up, doing my hair, wearing makeup) when I haven't felt up to it, but on the other hand, I wonder if my energy could've been put to better use elsewhere, rather than worrying about what people think of me based on my appearance or trying to keep up the "everything is fine" facade. I'm going to be talking more about this tomorrow, because it's too much for one day, so check back then x
#BeRealMarch information
Day 18 #BeRealMarch
Interesting topic! And I am glad you felt ok about seeing the friend, you have a lovely face, you look lovely without, honestly! I rarely wear makeup and I'm doing ok!x
ReplyDeleteThank you. I'm slowly starting to realise I'm not as 'scary' or terrible looking as I thought without makeup. Plus the world didn't end when I left the house without lipstick, so that's good!
DeleteI'm really happy for you, especially for the second breakthrough. You should never have to be shackled with embarrassment when you've done nothing to deserve it. I'm really looking forward to tomorrow's post.
ReplyDeleteThank you. Yeah I genuinely feel that and think "oh please don't properly look at me when I'm not wearing makeup", it's terrible!
DeleteI always feel like if I'm looking my worst I tend to bump into loads of people I haven't seen in years and am embarrassed by it but I've also gotten better over the years. Also I feel like the older I get the less make-up I wear, I usually just wear a bit of foundation and some liquid eyeliner to help me look awake (I feel like without eyeliner I just look half asleep all the time) but before I used to wear full on eyeliner with a very heavy handed application. Good to see you making this progress and you know about the thing how you wrote that your time/energy could have been used differently, well yeah, but on the other hand if it made you feel good at the time then it wasn't a waste. :)
ReplyDeleteThat's a good point, yes it does make me feel good. Yes, I looove eyeliner, that's what I 'need', my eyes are non existent without it!
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